Both, Yours and Mine
by SQSarcasm
Summary: Emma is diagnosed with a life threatning illness. Read to see what happens ON HOLD
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

*_"This wasn't only your choice Emma!" She wanted to be angry and scream. She wanted to throw things, but she couldn't. Just looking at how small and fragile the blonde was made her be overcome with grief and sadness. She didn't know that her hostile expresssion turned into one f sadness and pity. "Your expressionis exactly why I didn't want you to know. I didn't want you to look at me like your looking at me now Regina." Emma had meant to scream it out, but it came out soft and broken. And by the end of it she was panting. Her emotional state was taking a toll on her already weakend state. "Call me selfish, but Regina I didn't want you to suffer with me. I didn't want for you to watch me die. I didn't want your last memories of me be tainted by pity." Regina felt her blood once more, how could Emma believe she could dictate something like that. "So you would much rather I hate you?" Her voice darrk with an edge. Green eyes flashed determined. "At least you'd move on after me. I want you to be happy and you suffering along with this would never let you live that happy life you deserve. I would always be that dark shadow that held you back from letting yourself live." This time she was panting harder. She started coughing unontralablly. "Regina get a nurse." She coughed out with a bit of blood. Regina looked on in horror as blood dripped across the lip of the woman she loved. "HELP! HELP SOMEONE PLEASE!" She screamed at the top of her lungs. She heard te tell tale rushing footsteps of nurses rushing towards the room."Emma baby breathe, please."She pleaded with the blonde who seemed a bit gone.*_

_*S&Q*_

_6 months previous _

Emma had a smile on her face as she waited for Dr. Whale to come with the results of her check-up. Which her brunette girlfriend demanded since she had ran a temperature on and off for a week. She hated hospitals most of the time. But scrolling through the pictures of Henry, Regina and her were keeping her mind off of her hatred for the place. She started laughing at a picture of Regina and Henry doing stupid faces. "Hello Emma." The doctor greeted. If she had looked up from the picture, she would of seen the sad expression her friend was looking at her with. "Hey Vic. So am I healthy? Gina said if I'm not no sex for a month or untill I'm 100%." Victor had always found it cute how a smile would appear on the sheriffs face just by the mention of the mayor. But now it made his heart even more heavier to what he was about to tell the blonde. "Emma when you were a baby you had pneumonia didn't you?" the blonde nodded not really liking where this was going not in the least. "From then on you were always more open to getting the flu right?" Again she nodded."What's going on Vic?" Her eyes showed the fear she didn't want acknowledge. "You know when you get the chicken pox it leaves back this virus within you which is called Shingles. And you have that at an much advanced level. Shingles gives you nerve pain. But I think because since you were little you were and were always getting sick and being vulnerable to many different illnesses at as grown more advance." She followed everything he said but, didn't really understand it. "What the hell does it mean?" she asked aggravated also because he didn't come out and say it. "Emma this illness does not have a cure for it giving that it is very rare on its own. 2 in a 1000. It slowly affects the nerve system and slowly starts to shut down the nervoussystem. Their are only a handfull of treatments for it I have some options I would like you-" "Vic we've been friends for awhile now. And I'd like to believe that you have enough respect to not bullshit me." Her voice was meant to come out strong, but it sounded weak and scare and it broke his heart to see his best friend sound so weak. "Yes Emma I respect you enough not to do that. I just want you to look at these treatments. I know-" Emma stood up angrily glaring at the blonde man. "God damn it Vic! I need to know the damn truth! Am I dying? You said itwas advanced. tell me the truth and all of it." Her voice wasn't angry it was more pleading. Her voice cracked when she asked the question. The tension grew worse between the two blondes. She didn't want it to be true. She needed it not to be. And he couldn't tell her what she desprately wanted to be true. He got up and walked towards the window. She had seen him do this many times when he was troubled or he jusrt wanted to think. "Em this is hard-" her anger flared at his words. "What do mean this is hard? I might be the one that is dying. How in the name of fuck is this hard for you?" She knew her statements would get the doctor to tell her. "This isn't hard for me? You aren't the one that has to tell their best friend that they only have six months to live and theirs no slowing down the process with any of the research you've done. Because their isn't much of it begin with!" He stopped when he heard the sob leave the blonde. "Em I'm sorry!"he ran over to her apoligizing about what he said. "What are you sorry? I'm the one that pushed you." She tried wiping her tears away. Not wanting to show weakness. "So I got 6 months? Is it going to be one of those things that just kills me silently or am I going to suffer for the world to see?"Her voice was still cracking a bit. "Well it depends on how fast it affects you. But yeah its going to be one of those long drawn out I'm going to die, but you will suffer yes." Emma nods and let's it sink in. "I'll be back tomorrow. I'll look over the treatment plans tomorrow. But I need some time to think." "That's totally acceptable." He relented. She got up and went to the door. "Oh and Vic don't talk to _anyone_ about this." She stressed anyone. "Not even Regina?" "Not even _Regina._" Her eyes were brimming with tears at the mention of the woman she had come to love. "I need to think Vic!" she sadly.

**Ok so my second try at SQ let me now what you thought or liked or whatever. thxx for reading :***


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

"Good morning Emma." Emma's cheery nurse greeted her. She had a big smile on her face. And you couldn't not smile back. She was always a joy to the clinic. The patients loved her, because of her ability to make any day brighter. And Raina Wesly loved her job.

"Morning Rain." Emma's voice sounding hoarse as she spoke the greeting. "How are you feeling today Emma?" She asked as she went about opening the curtains in Emma's room. "I'm alright I actually slept a bit last night. But maybe that has something to do with the sleep medicine the doc put into my I.V" She said jokingly. Rain chuckled along with her. She saw most patients that came in lose their shine after a month, but not Emma. She still seemed to fight for the hope of beating the inevitable.

"Hey Rain could you pass me my notepad?" The blonde asked. Rain nodded and took the notepad for the blonde. "Are you writing a book or something? Because all I ever see you do is writing." She asked. And in truth it was all the blonde ever did. She never wanted to go out for fresh air or be around the other patients. The only person she warmed up to was Rain. "No. In a way I'm writing down everything I wished I said or done." Her eyes filled with tears she refused to let fall. Rain looked at her with sadness. The blonde never talked about her life before this but it seemed to haunt her. "I'll be back in an hour with breakfast ok." She said knowing the blonde would want sometime to herself.

Emma sighed harshly running her hand through her disheveled hair. A lone tear escaped her right eye and rolled down her cheek. She wiped it away harshly. She believed she had no right to cry. She had chosen this life and she'd have to bear her suffering.

She took her pen and it set to paper.

_1-05-13 _

_It's been 4 months. 120 days since I left. This might be the 160th letter I'm writing. Another letter you might never receive. Today would be our 3rd anniversary. Just the thought of not spending today with you shoots a pain through my heart. The day I left still fresh in my mind. I'm a coward for leaving, but I stand by my reason. I do not want you to have too suffer along with me in this. But through my actions I know I've made you suffer greatly. But today I want to try and remember the good time. It's the only thing that will get me through the day. I know you'll probably be cursingme for walking out. Wishing what happened three years ago never happened..._

Emma sighed as she rememered the day she had finally manned up and got her woman.

_3 years ago._

_It was labor day. The town was having a sort of celebration in the park. Emma was on duty as the sherriff and was walking around making sure the adults kept in line and the kids out of trouble. She saw Henry and his friends playing at the swing set. "Emma, you must be hungry." Granny offered her a sandwhich. The old lady always made sure she was well fed at events. "Thanks Granny this is good." Emma ate her sandwhich. "Why does the Mayor insist on you working every event? You must be tired. " She reminded Emma of a foster parent that always about her playing the dirt."Who else would keep things running smoothly?"Just then she noticed Leroy acting rambuctious once more. "Save me some dessert Gran I´ll be back later." Granny just nodded. _

_"Hey Leroy it's Labor Day, could you tone it down? It's a family event." She asked the slightly tipsy man. She was in no mood to deal with him again. Apperntly the man felt more compliant than usual saying he'd behave. Just as she was about to leave the group Laci came up infront of her. "Well Hello there Sheriff." She said seductively. Emma always wondered how she and Belle were related, talk about ying and yang. "Hi Laci I can't stay and chat I have a job to do." Emma said dismissingly."Oh but Em , you're never able to_ talk_." She ran her hands up the blonde's arms. Unknowingly o them they had attracted a dark glare, from a very pissed off woman._

_Regina had was looking on at the exchange between the blonde and the _tramp._ Atleast in her mind. Without concious descions she found herself walking towards the pair. She glared holes into the younger brunette's head. "Miss Swan do you not have a job you need to attend to? And Laci don't you have whatever insignificance you do to attend to." She leveled the girl with a glare that was surely meant kill. Laci knew better than to go against the mayor. It would not end well. Casting one more yearning look towards the blonde she left._

_"Thanks Regina I didn't know how to get rid of her." Emma stated thankfully. "Miss Swan you are here to work if you wish to consort with the likes of her, do so on your own free time." Regina said her eyes blazing with jealousy. " I don't wish to consort with Laci. But if I didn't know any better I believe it's eating you up bit"_

_Emma flashed a lavacious smile as she saw the Mayor's eyes darken. Regina's eyes flashed to her lips at once. Regina didn't know where it came from. but next thing she knew she was pulling the blonde behind a tent. "Maybe it is Miss Swan." And with that their lip met with a passion. _

_S&Q_

"Emma you there?" Rain asked pulling Emma from her memories. "Yeah just got caught up for a moment there." For the rest of the day that memory kept her strong. Unbeknownst to her it only served to break the woman she loved 's heart more.

**Ok so new chapter. R&R. I tried the paragrapgh thing. We all have our pet peeves but I get it. So I have school JOY. Next chap probs gonna be Friday. Let me know what u think. ThQ for the reviews and favs and follows. Peace **


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